I hopped into the taxi, bade the genial driver a good morning and settled in to stare out the window into the rain and the traffic. The radio was tuned (inevitably) to Dublin's Country Mix where the deejay was asking listeners to call, text, email or telex with their answers for the morning's competition (I think on Dublin's Country Mix they must have deejays, if not disk jockeys - certainly there are no DJs).
The puzzle he posed was thus: 11% of women and 16% of men admit to doing this in the workplace.
"Ah now" said genial taxi driver "that's a tough one, what do you reckon?" I looked at him in the mirror, trying to work out if he was taking the piss out of me or not. It seemed not. Fuck, I thought, it's a bit of a racy competition for Dublin's Country Mix at this hour of the morning, isn't it? I couldn't hide my dirty snigger from the driver as I hazarded a few guesses in my head.
11% of women and 16% of men admit to having affairs in the workplace... 11% of women and 16% of men admit to sleeping in the workplace... 11% of women and 16% of men admit to masturbating in the workplace... 11% of women and 16% of men admit to lusting after the boss in the workplace... 11% of women and 16% of men admit to not washing their hands after using the toilet in the workplace... 11% of women and 16% of men admit to picking their noses in the workplace...
A nice Garth Brooks number and the first few calls and texts began to trickle through. And fuck me if they didn't make me feel like such a deviant for entertaining thoughts such as the ones above. Breda wanted to know if it might be "going for a jog at lunchtime". Ann thought it might be "smiling at their colleagues in the morning". James, the dark horse, thought it might be that they "have a cigarette outside with some of the others". Thomas called to say that it was his seventieth birthday and that he thought it might be "playing the fool. You know, play acting, a bit of tomfoolery!".
"I think he might have it there" said genial taxi driver, nodding to himself.
The puzzle he posed was thus: 11% of women and 16% of men admit to doing this in the workplace.
"Ah now" said genial taxi driver "that's a tough one, what do you reckon?" I looked at him in the mirror, trying to work out if he was taking the piss out of me or not. It seemed not. Fuck, I thought, it's a bit of a racy competition for Dublin's Country Mix at this hour of the morning, isn't it? I couldn't hide my dirty snigger from the driver as I hazarded a few guesses in my head.
11% of women and 16% of men admit to having affairs in the workplace... 11% of women and 16% of men admit to sleeping in the workplace... 11% of women and 16% of men admit to masturbating in the workplace... 11% of women and 16% of men admit to lusting after the boss in the workplace... 11% of women and 16% of men admit to not washing their hands after using the toilet in the workplace... 11% of women and 16% of men admit to picking their noses in the workplace...
A nice Garth Brooks number and the first few calls and texts began to trickle through. And fuck me if they didn't make me feel like such a deviant for entertaining thoughts such as the ones above. Breda wanted to know if it might be "going for a jog at lunchtime". Ann thought it might be "smiling at their colleagues in the morning". James, the dark horse, thought it might be that they "have a cigarette outside with some of the others". Thomas called to say that it was his seventieth birthday and that he thought it might be "playing the fool. You know, play acting, a bit of tomfoolery!".
"I think he might have it there" said genial taxi driver, nodding to himself.
