Public Gets Irate, But Forget The Vote Date

Being an up-my-own-snot liberal leftie, I read the Irish Times. Never the Independent. "Nothing but a broadsheet tabloid" I sniff, preferring instead to read the Metro. At least they occasionally publish cute photos of cats. But the Jaffa Cake is job hunting and for reasons unfathomable, secondary schools throughout the land insist on publishing their vacancies in the Sindo.

I know I should bin all but the Business section. I know I shouldn't read LIFE magazine features over breakfast. Or at all. But like a bad blog, like a bad dog and a puddle of scutter, I can't resist a good nose. And what a stinker they had for me this week! Skip the pointless feature on the plus-size model who got an arse-lift and head straight to Donal Lynch's look into "the surreal world of Gaeilge" on page 22. It's stirring stuff.

LIP SERVICE says the bit that's not the headline in the corner. A clever pun! The pun fun continues with the headline COULDN'T GIVE A FOCAIL [sic] - a very witty pun on the word "focal" which, amusingly, sounds quite like like the word "fuck" in English. Richie Kavanagh would be proud.

De puns even dribble down to the sub-headline where Irish is referred to as "our 'first notional language'" ("notional" instead of "national"! Hilarious, right?) "It sounded like some kind of joke" begins his article. It reads like one, Donal. He goes on to resurrect as many bigoted clichés as his editor will allow, including (but not limited to) lambasting Padraig Ferriter (and presumably misspelling his name - maybe Donal Doodle's computer doesn't have fadas...) because he "blatantly" speaks perfect English and comparing Eamon O Cuiv (no pesky fada on his name either!) to Hitler. The piece is accompanied by a photo of Peig Sayers, postergirl for Gaeilge and "grist to the gravy train that is the Irish language". "Peig Sayers, witty feminist" wouldn't really be Donal's style.

The piece is full of dúirt bean liom go ndúirt bean leí - so and so says that... that Irish children can't read good or learn to do other stuff good because they're too busy living DeV's wet dream, that Irish is a preserve of the urban middle class elite (thank you, David McWilliams), that the Gaeltacht is populated by béal bocht chancers and that "it's just jobs for the boys", that though the European Union have recognised Irish as an official language, Gaeilgeoirí don't have the linguistic expertise to make it viable, that TG4's presenters speak a "strange American-Irish hybrid that Europe turned its nose up at", that Irish was mainly spoken in the North "among IRA men trying to confuse British soldiers"and that "French and German are being slowly swamped and eroded by anglicisations" so "we may as well enjoy the huge advantage that native English gives us in the world". And not sit at home reading Foinse and watching Ros na Rún, presumably.

A completist in his rehashing of every other tedious feature ever written about Irish, Donal mentions that almost a million and a half people claim to be able to speak fluent or near-fluent Irish and that most people overestimate their ability to speak the language. Disappointingly, he doesn't venture to discuss why those million and a half people would be motivated to tell boastful, purposeless lies.

The high point for me is when Donal suggests a Gaeilgeoir tax. "With the boom well and truly over, Irish is a pointless little luxury that the State should let people pay for, if they want to."

Grand, so. Who should I make the cheque out to?

Freak Out Gnomics

I have an ostrich approach to economics and a dose of dyscalculia, I keep hearing that we're in a recession but I don't understand how or why. Where has all the money gone? Surely someone must have it. A gawk at my online banking (and a nod from the barman in Solas) tells me where mine has gone, but my fritterings have hardly caused a crash in the global economy.

I have a good job but I don't get paid much. Enough to cover the rent, enough to live a good life. I don't own a car but I pay insurance on two, I don't own a house but there are two I can call home. My dinner comes from Aldi, my dresses come from Penneys. I couldn't tell you how much a pint should cost but I wouldn't hesitate to buy you one. Even if I didn't like you very much.

So what does today's budget mean for me? This is not a rhetorical question. Make with the pithy, witty answers in the comments please.

One In Four

ONE in four people believe women who have been raped are partly to blame for the crime because of how they dressed, their sexual history or how much they had to drink. (link here)

I heard this on the radio last night and wondered this morning if my tired brain had made it up. I have very frequent and vivid nightmares; I wondered if the story was a fragment of last night's unpleasantness that had followed me into my Wednesday. My cursory reading of the paper this morning saw no mention of the poll, so I assumed that I'd made it up. Then I read Twenty's post.

The figures:

• 10% of people think the victim is entirely at fault if she has had a number of sexual partners.
• 37% think a woman who flirts extensively is at least complicit, if not completely in the wrong, if she is the victim of a sex crime.
• 33% think a woman is either partly or fully to blame if she wears revealing clothes.
• 38% believe a woman must share some of the blame if she walks through a deserted area.

Sam's comment over at Twenty's was one of the (very*) few considered efforts to respond to his understated post :

It is hard to know where to start with cretins like this. Attitudes like this bear some responsibility for some rape victims never reporting the crime done against them. They also betray a pretty pitiful view of men as lower order creatures who mustn’t be riled or stimulated in case they bite and wouldn’t that be your own fault too.

I have not been raped, but like many women I have had cause to be anxious on occasion (remember this bastard?). I didn't report him, I would not have known what to say. I would have been worried that my own actions that night would be called into question and that I would be made to feel worse for having made a fuss. Why didn't I ignore him when he first spoke to me? Why didn't I just get a taxi? What was I thinking going out drinking in the first place? I was wracked with guilt after that night, wondering if there was something about me that encouraged him, something I did, something I am.

I have had my share of lovers. I am an incorrigible flirt, albeit a clumsy one. I wear skirts to show off my legs. I like to walk home.

One in four think I'm asking for it?

I would imagine that some of these people are voicing their opinions on the subject of "date rape"** though I have nothing to say that the questionnaire was phrased in such a way as to imply date rape as opposed to gang rape, marital rape, prison rape, oral rape, anal rape or any other violation. I imagine this to be the case in a vain effort to get my head around the survey's conclusions, because I cannot believe that people can be so sanctimonious, so judgemental, so unforgiving in the face of something so awful. I'm disgusted at myself for wondering this at all, because it means that subconsciously I'm considering date rape as something that could be invited.

*The other cunts would put you off commenting on what is a very readable blog - like a load of smelly and ignorant arseholes would deter you from your favourite pub.

**"Date rape" is a term I very much take issue with. Blakkat has written an articulate piece on the subject, it's a long post but worth a read.